Excerpts from Manhood from the Hood

Webster’s II New College Dictionary defines “coach” as “one who gives private instruction…a private tutor.”

That kind of reminds us of the role of a parent. We give our children private instruction—we tutor them.

So even if you’ve never officially been a coach on the sports field, if you are a parent, you are a coach as well!

More from Coach Denny Welter and why he was so inspired by Bill’s stories of grandfather Roddy.

36. Don’t ask for something that you can do for yourself.

37. Never accept anything from anyone that you don’t earn.

38. How to refrain from getting young girls pregnant and should focus on going to college.

39. Make something out of yourself by going to college and getting an education.

40. My grandparents never talked to us about finances.

41. Study halls were temporary holding pens as far as I was concerned.  Respect education.

42. Obey the family values or there will be hell to pay.  Case closed.

43. Live under my grandparent’s strict, non-negotiable code of values.

44. Basketball is a chess game in motion.  You have to use your mind and intelligence to perform consistently and grow as a player.  First you have to master the fundamentals and then the sky is the limit.  Becoming a great basketball player is a long process.  It takes dedication and many hours of practice.

45. Use education to better yourself.

46. Ernest – What we talked about when we were together was more important than the amount of time we spent together.

Fatherhood lost…and not forgotten


My dad passed away and was buried during the first 2 weeks of August 1987. So for twenty-four years, the first 2 weeks of August have been a time of deep reflection for me.

My dad and I had a close bond while I was a little girl. He could do no wrong in the eyes of his only daughter.

But from the time I reached puberty until his death, our relationship was contentious. Dad was a proud, unyielding, old school type of guy—common for his generation. That clashed mightily with my budding feminism throughout the 1970s and ‘80s.  We bewildered—no, pissed one another off—regularly.

But it’s during this anniversary time that I think about how much I’ve evolved and matured over the twenty-four years he has been gone; how I’ve made peace with the man who used to rile me up. I know I loved him and I know he loved me before I even knew what love is. If he were still alive today, surely Dad would have matured and evolved as well, don’t you think?

Remember that old saying about most of life’s traumas? “One day you’ll look back on this and laugh!”

Dad, I’m laughing my head off at our former silliness. I bet you are laughing too.

Excerpts from Manhood from the Hood

More from Coach Denny Welter and why he was so inspired by Bill’s stories of grandfather Roddy.

31.)  We bonded through class work and sports

32.) In younger days, we all got nickname given to us, usually by someone who was very respected in the community.  You never chose your own nickname.

33.)  Stay in school, stay out of trouble, and avoid drugs or alcohol.

34.)  It takes an entire village to raise a child.

35.)  Work hard on something you value.

Excerpts from Manhood from the Hood

More from Coach Denny Welter and why he was so inspired by Bill’s stories of grandfather Roddy.

Denny’s father, Ray Welter, believed in the work ethic. Denny grew up on a 160 acre farm and his dad was always telling him and his 2 brothers to get out in the fields and work.  And Dad didn’t mean the baseball field–he meant the corn field.

So the Welter kids developed a hard work ethic from their dad that carried them through the sports they played as well as through the positive life they chose!

26.) Take pride in what you have and don’t worry about keeping up with the Jones’.

27.) Great fathering is a family tradition.

28.) The value of Little League baseball was my life-long friendship with Ernest Leaks.

29.) Respect your elders both within your family and outside of it.

30.) Help each other with class work without being asked.