Advice to my 21-year old Self, by Bruce Wiessner

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Bruce & Julia

1. When I turned 21 years old I was starting my junior year at the University of Minnesota.

By this time in my life I had already completed two years of service (out of a six year commitment) in the Minnesota Air National Guard as a medic.  I had, also, started my own business (Metro Legal Services) to help pay my way through school and was playing the violin in the University of Minnesota Symphony Orchestra.  I also was starting my first year at the University of Minnesota School of Business Administration (now Carlson School of Management) and was active in and living in a fraternity on campus.

2. What did you worry about – what was that one thing that you feared the most?

My greatest fear at the time was being called to active military duty from the National Guard and dying in the Vietnam War.  The Vietnam War was a hugely unpopular war, by then, and protests were rampant on college campuses all over the country.  Martin Luther King and Robert F. Kennedy had already been assassinated.  I can remember having to clear University Avenue of smoldering barricades made from bonfires started the night before in order to leave campus to get to National Guard duty on Saturday mornings. The University was closed down during the Spring Quarter of my junior year because of student unrest and protests.  This turbulent period made it interesting for me entering adulthood to attempt to “discover” myself.  This backdrop of unrest became the incubator for the new and emerging counter-culture.  As a result, traditional “American Values” were under siege and being challenged.

3. What did you hope the future held for you?

At age 21, I didn’t have much time to ponder the future.  Attending classes, playing in the orchestra, running a part-time business and serving in the military occupied my time.  I didn’t think about why I was doing it – I was too busy doing it!  In retrospect, I wish that I had taken more time to try to understand the consequences of these activities on my life.  Perhaps, I was a little bit like the Nike commercial, “just do it”.  I became a “jack of all trades, master of none” sort of guy.  This suited me because I had a lot of interests (maybe some ADD built in there, too).

4. How did you define what it meant to be a man?

It was expected, back then, that when you graduated from college you were on your own.  Becoming a “man” was a learning process and living independently on you own was one part of that process.

5. What advice do you give to that young man of yesterday?

Looking back with the wisdom of experience that I’ve acquired (I’m old), I would advise myself to take the time to reflect on and better understand my true value system.  Values are derived from multiple sources including religious, family and cultural.  I wish, in hindsight, that I had understood this better.  I would have been more grounded in that value system which would have helped guide my decision making.

Advice to my 21 year old self, Cal Hoskins

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Cal's answers to his 21-year old self.

1. When you were 21 years old, where were you living and what were you doing?

I was livivng in Grand Rapids Michigan and I was really trying to figure what direction to go in, not sure of who I was at the time.

2. What did you worry about–what was that one thing that you feared the most?

I worried about and feared the most of being a failure in anything I tried doing. I wanted to succeed, but did know how.

3. What did you hope the future held for you?

My hope back then was to be truly loved and accepted to belong somewhere.

4. How did you define what it meant to be a man?

I falsely defined being a man by how many women I could bed and how high I could get and how many lies I could tell.

5. What advice do you give today to that young man of yesterday?

I would tell that younger me to listen and obey your parents and make decisions that are in line with the values you were taught.


Advice to My 21-year-old Self, by Ed Gschneidner

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Ed gives advice to his 21-year old self

1. When you were 21 years old, where were you living and what were you doing?

I was living in a fraternity and going to college at Iowa State University in Ames, Iowa.  I was taking courses in the architecture program studying to become an architect.  At the same time I was involved in the fraternity, working part-time at a grocery store in the produce department, and spending most of my free time convincing my future wife to join me for pizza and beer

2. What did you worry about–what was that one thing that you feared the most?

That period of time saw unemployment and economic activity reminiscent of our current circumstances in 2010 and 2011.  Many of the architectural graduates I knew were working bagging groceries and were not able to find positions with architectural firms.

3. What did you hope the future held for you?

I hoped that upon graduation from college that I could find meaningful work in my chosen field and that I would be facing life’s challenges with my then fiancé Martha.

4. How did you define what it meant to be a man?

I can honestly say that I never gave being a man any thought – it was just part of my “being”.  I’m sure that a lot that being was based on whatever I learned from living with my own father and the fathers of my friends and neighbors.  From my father I think I absorbed the importance of hard work, education and knowledge, and respect for other people without reservation.

5. What advice do you give today to that young man of yesterday?

Life is not a passive activity, get engaged, have a take, and try to make things happen – these are still things that I struggle with in life today.

Hello from Bill Roddy!

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People have repeatedly asked me: “Bill, what does Manhood From the Hood stand for?”

If Manhood From the Hood were my business, most likely a community service business, our mission statement would be:

“Manhood From the Hood is committed to reclaiming and rebuilding the positive masculine ideals of integrity with commitment, strength with humility, intensity with compassion, throughout our culture.”

But Manhood From the Hood is not a business–it’s life. As mature men, we’ve gained so much experience/knowledge–experience/knowledge that we wish we’d had when we were 21. Crucial experience/knowledge that we must pass on to the next generation.

So imagine sitting down to have a conversation with your 21-year-old self. What would you say to him?

I’d like to invite you to join me in participating in a series of articles entitled, “Advice to my 21-year-old Self.” Contact me if you’d like to participate. I will interview you in a short series of questions. I will post a new interview on this blog each Friday, beginning New Year’s Eve.

A free copy of Manhood from the Hood goes to the first 10 interviewees!